Birdperson: You appear to be dying. Ice-T: Who would take a lobster to see Iron Man 3? Please help me!! Rick: Trade secret, Mr. President. Ya gotta get schwifty (Morty starts beating a tambourine in rhythm) Ya gotta get schwifty in here Look at the heads! (Jerry is holding an ice cream cone, Beth looks unimpressed.) With all due respect, I’d like to hear what Rick and Morty have to play. And I was kinda hoping that I could get a selfie with you? Rick: (picks up a microphone) All right, Morty, let’s get ready to do it! NOW WE’LL SEE WHICH OF THEM HAS GOT THE MOST. Cromulon: That was Chunky Tunk with “Full Ming Mong, Empty Gorp Dorp.” Up next, planet Earth!
(Morty presses a key and a beat starts, Rick knocks over a mic stand and starts “singing”) Dance music plays in the background as the Cromulon narrates.) The yellow Cromulon is in front of the stage staring.) President: Actually, if you try to tell anyone what happened here, we’ll deny it and probably worse. (Outside the church, Principal Vagina is ties up with balloons and rope. BUT IN THE END, THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE. (Morty steps through different portals to different worlds, ending up in Buttworld.) (At the church, Principal Vagina and other priests are talking with Jerry and Beth.) Ice-T: I have changed. You know what I’m sayin’? Magnesium-J: Word of your selfless acts on the Earth planet have travelled across the galaxy. Summer! (Outside the church, Principal Vagina is on the sidewalk on his knees) Principal Vagina: Please be kind to us for we are but tiny things with entire bodies stuck to your ground. (Giant Head clears its throat, creating a large wind blast)
Mr. Goldenfold: The heads disqualified Vagina! Hooray Principal Vagina!”) "Get Schwifty " is a song sung by Rick Sanchez accompanied by Morty Smith. A news title says “ArmagHEADdon?!”.)
Let’s go to the Ascension. Simon: Sir, the magnetic poles are about to reverse.
(Nathan smashes a button and two nuclear missiles emerge from the ground in the desert. (Water-T produces a pistol on each T-end and begins walking out.) Jerry: We’ll take our chances raising her without fancy new jobs outside of a potato-based religion. It was really fun. Stop that!
(at the church, everyone lifts Principal Vagina, “What do you know, he was right! It first made an appearance in Chapter 3 of Rick and Morty's Rushed Licensed Adventure as one of the songs on Summer's music player used to wake up Rick. He doesn’t think about the consequences of anything he does. The Cromulon zooms closer.) Principal Vagina: No! This watch turns people into snakes! Jerry: Summer, listen carefully.
Mr. Goldenfold: The heads love this! You were just being lazy! 0 of 2 people found this review helpful. There are way too many buttons on this thing! (He is hit with an energy blast from Rick and disappears.) President: It won’t matter how schwifty you get, Morty. (drinks from flask) But unless this (holds up a necklace with a cross) can beat that… what have you done for me lately? Principal Vagina: Giant head in the sky, please forgive all that we’ve done.
24 HOURS, FIVE PLANETS, FIVE SONGS. Rick: Yeah, *burp* you see, I try to shelter you from certain realities, *burp* Morty. Another portal appears in the ceiling and Rick drops out of it with several snacks.) Principal Vagina: I’m sure that has… that has nothing to do with this. (On the stage, the President grabs the microphone and speaks to the control room staff.) Principal Vagina: Headism is a hit. Get me Pharrell, Randy Newman, Billy Corgan, and The-Dream. (A news anchor in a raincoat, Terry, is downtown with people panicking in the background as the giant head stares blankly at Earth. Abort! Earth reappears in another galaxy with four other planets, a disco ball-like sun, and several different-colored Cromulons looking at Earth.) Rise to the giant head! The beams form another beam that hits Ice-T and transforms him into a letter T made of water.) Use the HTML below.
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